There is a Jewish custom of writing an ethical will in which we convey our hopes and concerns to our children.
Since I’m a speechwriter, I wanted to write a speech to be delivered when my son Leo arrives, expressing my hopes and concerns for his life.
Leo, we’ve been expecting you. We knew you’re a boy, because we saw it on the scan.
The nurse announced ‘There’s his willy’.
And your mum said: ‘Does that mean it’s a boy?’
The nurse repeated, ‘He’s got a willy’.
Your mum said: ‘Are you sure?’